Sometimes a little getaway...

It was 2003. My husband and I were still together, living in Vermont, and our relationship was not doing well. It had been a rough 2 years. My therapist, suggested a getaway to focus just on me. And no, not a spa week or something like that. She told me about a place called the Omega Institute in upstate NY. Think summer camp for adults. At the time I was living in southern Vermont about 2 hours from there. I am not sure how I researched the place as it was 2003 and while there were computers, it was clearly a dial up world. Now that I think about it, maybe it was a paper catalog? Anyway, somehow I found the place, and turns out they had a work exchange program, where they would provide me a place to live and my meals in exchange for me working 25 hours a week. At the time I really just needed to get away (and not a “getaway”) So I signed on for a 7 week work exchange. My housing would be my tent, and while I loved camping on the weekend in one, I had never spent 7 weeks living in one, by myself, in all kinds of weather.

I remember the day I arrived. It was pouring rain and looked like it would not be stopping anytime soon. So after dinner I decided to cozy up in my car to spend the night, hoping for blue skies in the morning to set up my tent and find out what I’d be doing for work for the next 7 weeks.

A little background on the Omega Institute for those unfamiliar with it. It is a holistic retreat center offering weekend, weeklong and monthly retreats and workshops focussing on mind, body, spirit, and artistic and creative pursuits. They host thousands of people throughout the season (April-October) who come to explore a variety of topics. The land is beautiful and the guests stay in what was an old summer camp (but has since had an upgraded and upscale accommodations boost!)

At the time, when I signed on I did not know any of this. Ignorance is bliss as they say. I never practiced yoga, although I had heard of it. I remember a PBS show in the 1970’s, “Lilias yoga”. Yoga in the 70s and 80s was not all like the yoga we know today. It was more traditional, less flashy and focussed on the spiritual parts of yoga. Even in 2003, yoga was just starting to become more maistream. Lululemon hadn’t really exploded until the mid to late 2000s.

Back to my arrival at Omega. The next morning was lovely. I set up my tent and wandered from the campground over to the big dining hall on the hill. Picture a long staircase leading up to a grand covered porch, with big tables looking out onto a grassy field. Inside the buffet lines held all the yummy breakfast food you could want; oatmeal, scrambled eggs, yogurt, fresh fruit, home fried potatoes, muffins, bread, peanut butter, jam. I was going to be okay. After breakfast I showed up to work. I would be working at the cafe which served light snacks, coffee and drinks between buffet meals at the big dining hall. I only had to work 25 hours a week and then had the rest of the time free to explore all the programs on offer to staff. Art, meditation, yoga, movement, dance, chanting, swimming or kayaking in the lake, or just swinging in a hammock. This same year I met a woman who would become one of my dearest friends and has taught me so much about living my own life. In fact, I met so many amazing people that my 7 weeks turned into 14 weeks.

the grand dining hall

When I returned home to Vermont in the Fall my husband had decided to move in with a friend down in NY and I spent the winter working at a local cafe and trying to figure out what was next for me. I began to think about my summer and how life seemed so simple. All I had to do was work and all my needs were met. I had a place to sleep and meals and built in community. I didn’t realize how important community was until I experienced it. The past few years had been so isolating and stressful. So I decided to apply to work at Omega again this coming season. I couldn’t afford to do the work exchange again, so I applied for a paying position working 40 hours a week in the kitchen. Since I would be full-time I no longer had to sleep in a tent but got an upgrade to a dorm room.

In April I left our apartment in Vermont and headed back to Omega. I was hired as a breakfast cook and 5 days a week I got up and went to work at 5 am cooking breakfast for 500-1000 people. Prior to this, I had worked mostly in restaurants and cafes cooking one dish at a time. So this was a whole new world. But I loved it. Each morning it would be so quiet and peaceful from 5-7 am, just myself and the other breakfast cook, until the rest of the kitchen crew showed up. Once breakfast started it was non stop in the kitchen. And I loved it. Working together with a team that became like family, with all the fun and disFUNction you’d expect. If you’ve ever worked in a restaurant you know exactly what I mean. I could only focus on the work at hand and then when I finished working at 1 pm I had the day to explore all the experiences that were offered or just connecting with people of all ages, from all around the country and world. And then I got to go back to my dorm room and ponder the rest of my life.

A few weeks into my second year, I went for a walk with one of the guys that worked in the kitchen with me. Let’s call him M. He had been there the previous year as well and we realized we had briefly met over breakfast one morning. But working in different departments hadn’t really connected after that. On this walk I don’t really remember much of what we talked about, but I remember it feeling really easy, and comfortable, like I could just be myself. I also remember it started raining but we kept walking and talking. It wasn’t long after that walk that we started “hanging out” together and going off campus to dinner, parks. It was starting to feel like “something.” I wasn’t really looking for “something” as technically I was still married. Before I left for Omega, my husband and I had agreed on a legal separation. I was honest with M from the beginning that I was married, and it was complicated, but I really enjoyed our time together. He seemed okay with all that, and things seemed easy. I had been married for 13 years and M was the first person besides my husband that I had “been with” since I had been married. I won’t go into details here, but let’s just say I discovered new things about myself, and I liked it. I also felt comfortable in my body, which over the past few years and the stress of the marriage, I was not feeling good about myself or taking care of myself.

who are these children?

We ended up spending the entire season together and when October rolled around I had decided to file for divorce. I felt like my life was on hold. My husband was living with another woman in NY and I did not want to go back to our apartment in Vermont by myself. I needed something new. A fresh start. M had sold his house right before he came to Omega that Spring, so he was also ready for something new as well.

One night we were hanging out in his trailer (he was a manager so he got a “trailer upgrade” instead of a dorm room) and just chatting about plans for when the season ends. Lots of relationships lasted a “season” at Omega. It was the nature of the place, summer camp romance and all… ha! I am not sure who brought it up but somehow we started talking about visiting Mexico.

“I’ve always wanted to visit,” I said. “My husband’s family was from there, but he didn’t like to fly so we never even talked about going there.”

M also wanted to go, even though the only Spanish he spoke was tacos and quesadillas.

I think part of it was because of some of our coworkers in the kitchen. In addition to the work exchangers like us, the kitchen also hired locals who lived off campus (most were from Mexico that season) to fill in the gaps in the huge production kitchen. They spoke enough English to get by and were amazing workers. One woman in particular, was one of the hardest workers I had ever known, and spoke English fairly well. Her brother and cousin also worked there and when we told her we were thinking about going to Mexico when the season ended, she got so excited and told us we must visit her family. She was actually going back for the first time in many years. (Side note: We later found out that she was bringing money back so her grandfather could build a bathroom at his home. And we also later learned that she could fly to Mexico, but not fly back to the states. “A guy” was going to meet them and take them over the border. Which turned out to be a harrowing trip, we later learned. But that’s not my story.)

Another coworker (a work exchanger like us) who worked in the kitchen was living in the states, but his parents lived in Mexico and he was visiting them, so he invited us to start our trip off by staying with them for a few days, and that would help us get a little comfortable before heading out on our own.

So it was randomly decided that when the season ended in a few weeks, we would head to Mexico, with our backpacks, a Lonely Planet guidebook (remember those, pre-internet iPhone days) a Spanish phrase book (again, no Google translate back then and my high school Spanish was bit rusty…ha!) and a one way ticket. Sounds like a great idea to travel in a foreign country with someone you just met a few months ago, no actual itinerary, a one way ticket and neither of you really speaking much of the language. Amazingly we spent 2 months backpacking through Mexico and learning ALOT about ourselves and others. (But that is a story for another day.)

What I will say is that 20 years later we are still together. Still hanging out.

Thank you for being here with me today and reading my ramblings. Please let me know if you liked today’s post by tapping the “heart” and add a comment if anything in particular resonated with you. I always enjoy hearing from you! I am so Incredibly grateful for all of my readers and subscribers, All of your likes, comments, and notes are truly an inspiration to me.